THE TSA FILES
INT.
MANSION - NIGHT
This
scene takes place in the future, and we will see a form of it again.
SPINELLI,
a short teen wearing all black, is fighting with THREE MEN—tough looking, and
also in dark colors. She fights in a martial
arts type of way, while her attackers go straight for the punches. She dodges them most of the time, and
manages to get in several kicks, punches, and shoves.
She
knocks MAN #1 down. He lies slumped on
the floor. MAN #2 runs down the hall to
the right, talking on his walky-talky.
The music stops. Spinelli
knee-kicks MAN #3 in the groin and runs off down the hall.
INT.
THE GIRLS’ BEDROOM AT THE TSA - DAY
The
shot is angled from behind Spinelli. We
see the back of Spinelli sitting cross-legged on a bed.
She
is typing at a laptop computer. We see
the letters come up the screen and hear her voice as she types:
SPINELLI (V.O.)
File One: Spinelli. My fourth year at the TSA, but
first year as a co-leader.
EXT.
ROAD THROUGH WOODS - DAY
AERIAL
VIEW: A black sedan is driving through New England woods in the summer.
INT.
CAR - DAY
There
are four people in the car. Anna-Maria Spinelli, called SPINELLI, sits in the
passenger seat. She is a fair-skinned eighteen-year-old with short straight
black hair. She’s wearing dark
sunglasses, an oversized black T-shirt, and baggy jeans. She is short with a
tiny frame, but her arms are very muscular.
Her
aunt, CECILIA, is driving. She is an
immaculate woman, with a neatly pressed blouse and skirt, and black hair put up
in a bun.
SPINELLI
(V.O. cont.)
Unfortunately, I had to bring my cousins,
Peter and Bruce.
The
camera reveals Peter and Bruce in the backseat. PETER
is twelve years old, thin and gawky, with brown hair.
BRUCE
is thirteen, slightly chubby, with dirty blonde hair. As Spinelli’s voiceover continues, the camera switches between
close-ups of the different people in the car.
SPINELLI (V.O. cont.)
Their parents and my aunt are all going to
Greece for a month. Aunt Cecilia knew I’d be responsible
and take care of them while I was at our “Save the Earth Campaign” summer
get-together. God. I don’t understand how she actually believes I’d be in a
campaign that recycles and picks up trash. Well, actually, we don’t exactly
save the earth, but I guess the TSA is not that
far from it…
EXT. WOODS IN FRONT OF BUILDING - DAY
Shot of white, one-level building with no windows in the front. The car pulls up next to building. Spinelli, then Peter and Bruce, get out of the car. Spinelli goes straight to the trunk to haul stuff out. Cecilia stays in the car.
CECILIA
Anna-Maria.
Spinelli sighs and
looks agitated.
CECILIA
Are you all right? Or should I go in—?
SPINELLI
No, I’m fine. We’re fine. Have a nice trip, Aunt Cecilia.
CECILIA
Alright then.
Well, bye bye, dear. Bye Peter! Bye Bruce! Have fun!
The car pulls away down the road.
SPINELLI
(To Bruce and Peter)
C’mon.
Spinelli walks to the front door of the building.
Bruce and Peter follow.
BRUCE (V.O.)
File Two. Bruce. Hey, this is cool. Um, my cousin
Peter and I were staying at our eighteen-year-old cousin’s environmental summer
program, at least that’s what we thought. Peter thought it sounded dorky. I
thought it was a good idea, though—to recycle and stuff. Besides, Anna-Maria is
definitely not dorky.
They enter the building.
INT. TSA MAIN ROOM - CONTINUOUS
Shot of inside of the TSA building— large, rather
bare room. There are couches and chairs
and a coffee table thrown together in the middle of the room. Towards the back, there is a small kitchen
area. There is also a banner up in the back that says “WELCOME, TSA
MEMBERS!” There are four doors to other
rooms along the side.
Three girls and two guys are sitting in chairs or
standing, talking. They look up to see
Spinelli, Peter, and Bruce and say hello.
SPINELLI
Hey, guys.
Hellos are exchanged.
TERRENCE
(Looking at Peter and Bruce)
Who are they?
SPINELLI
These are my cousins,
Peter and Bruce. Their parents and my
aunt are vacationing in Greece, so they’re going to spend the month with
us. Peter, Bruce, this is…
Nicole…
NICOLE
has pouty lips and is wearing a short tight dress. Her hair is thick, straight, and dark brown. She is wearing
strappy high heels. She looks somewhat
like Posh Spice.
SPINELLI
Mary Ellen…
MARY
ELLEN has a big smile and short fluffy blonde hair. She’s wearing a fuzzy pink
sweater and light blue short skirt.
SPINELLI
Michelle…
MICHELLE
has mocha-colored skin. Her hair is all in little braids with beads at the
end. She’s wearing a black tank top and
green skirt with tassels that fall just below her knees.
SPINELLI
Terrence…
TERRENCE
is black, with hair cut close to his scalp.
He’s wearing a basketball jersey and shorts. He also has wire-rimmed glasses.
SPINELLI
..and Sly.
SLY
has black spiky hair sticking up all over the place. He’s wearing a white shirt, jeans, black boots, and sunglasses.
Greetings
are exchanged.
SPINELLI
So where’s Jason?
MARY ELLEN
He went for a walk before
dinner.
MICHELLE
We ordered pizza. In fact, we should go get it now.
SPINELLI
Alright. I’m going to go find Jason, my new
co-leader-in-crime. See you later.
EXT. WOODS - DAY
Spinelli, Peter, and Bruce leave the TSA building and walk
up a dirt path that leads into the woods. After a moment:
PETER
Anna-Maria,
why did the banner inside say “Welcome, TSA Members”? Why didn’t it say “SEC
Members”?
SPINELLI
Don’t
call me that. Call me Spinelli while
we’re here. Got that?
PETER
Got
it. But what about the banner?
Spinelli sighs.
SPINELLI
I’ll tell
you later.
There is a rustle of leaves and a teenage boy pops out at
them from side grove of bushes. Spinelli, Peter, and Bruce jump and Peter and
Bruce gasp.
SPINELLI
Shit,
Jason.
JASON is wearing jeans and a gray
shirt with the Nike symbol in the top corner.
He is fairly muscular and medium-tall.
He has messy brown hair. He is grinning (which he does a lot).
JASON
I’m good, huh?
So, Spin, which one’s Bruce and which is Peter?
PETER
I’m
Peter, and this Bruce.
JASON
Hey
there.
(To Spinelli)
How ya
doin’?
SPINELLI
Fine,
until you scared me like that.
JASON
You know
you love me.
Spinelli snorts, but smiles just a little bit.
BRUCE (V.O.)
Anna-Maria—
uh, Spinelli— didn’t look too mad. Then again, you couldn’t see her eyes. It’s
always hard to tell what Anna-Maria is thinking or feeling since she almost
always wears black sunglasses. I once heard that eyes are the windows to your
soul. I guess you could say Anna-Maria closes the shades to her windows.
INT. TSA MAIN ROOM - EVENING
All of the TSA members are sitting on the floor, on the
couch, or in chairs eating pizza.
MARY ELLEN
It’s so
nice to be back.
Nods of agreement from other TSA members.
TERRENCE
(To Spinelli and
Jason)
How does
it feel to be co-leaders, guys?
JASON
Feels
pretty good!
SPINELLI
It’s a
lot of responsibility.
JASON
And fun.
SPINELLI
Yeah, if
you think dealing with life or death stuff is fun.
She notices Peter and Bruce.
SPINELLI
Uh, I
mean, one of those plastic rings that holds six-packs of soda could totally
kill a duck!
She gets strange looks from everyone.
JASON
Let me
guess. You haven’t told them yet.
NICOLE
Wait,
what?
MARY ELLEN
Ducks?
JASON
Well, we are the Save the Earth Campaign, guys…
TERRENCE
Ohhh…
MICHELLE
Oh! Right!
NICOLE
Poor defenseless duckies.
SPINELLI
Okay, okay. Cut it out. C’mon,
Peter. Bruce.
She gets up and leads Peter and
Bruce out of the building. There’s silence in the room with the
remaining TSA members, then Sly evilly chuckles:
SLY
Hehehe. Ducks!
EXT. WOODS OUTSIDE TSA – SUNSET
Peter, Spinelli, and Bruce are
outside. Spinelli is fidgeting and pacing a little.
PETER
What’s going on?
SPINELLI
Look. I have to tell you guys about
our club. It’s not the SEC. It’s the
TSA. Teenage Spy Association.
BRUCE
Spy? You mean, like,
secret agent stuff?
SPINELLI
Yeah, sort of. I like to think of us
as mini-CIA agents. Except with fewer resources unfortunately. The government
won’t give us any really expensive gadgets since we’re teens.
PETER
Whoa. So do you like beat guys up?
SPINELLI
Yeah, sometimes.
Bruce appears worried, but Peter’s excited.
PETER
Can we help??
SPINELLI
Mm. We’ll see.
INT. MAIN TSA ROOM - NIGHT
Bruce and Peter are intently watching the teen spies as they
all play a card game. The lights are
dim and orangey. The camera glides around the circle of teens, showing
close-ups of their eyes darting back and forth sneakily.
PETER (V.O.)
Now that I knew I was surrounded by
spies, I was hoping we’d get a call from some deep, gravelly voice telling us
about a mission. But nothing really interesting happened. We just sat around
playing this card game called Spoons, which they said is the perfect spy game
because you have to be sneaky and steal a spoon without anyone noticing. I hope
stealing a spoon isn’t the coolest thing these spies do.
BRUCE (V.O.)
I was feeling sort of… well,
unsafe. I mean, these were spies. You couldn’t trust them, right? I’d seen some James Bond movies, read some
spy novels. When you’re a spy, people
you might think are your best friends can stab you in the back at any
time. The TSA probably had lots of
enemies out to get them. Would I survive the summer?
There is a contrasting eruption of laughter from Spoon
players as Terrence and Mary Ellen scramble for the remaining spoon.
INT. GIRLS’ BEDROOM - DAY
CLOSE ON: Spinelli, eyes closed (no sunglasses for once),
with a pillow behind her head.
Nicole, Michelle, and Mary Ellen can be heard chatting and
moving around. Suddenly loud rock music is blasting. Spinelli’s eyes flicker
open.
SPINELLI
Uhh, crap.
Mary Ellen, on the other hand, is all smiles and rainbows as
usual.
MARY ELLEN
‘Morning, Spinelli.
SPINELLI
What’s up with the screaming music
of agony at this early hour?
NICOLE
It’s ten o’clock. You’re the last one up. It’s Jason’s music. I think it’s meant as a wake-up call.
SPINELLI
You’d think he could be a little
more subtle…
INT. TSA MAIN ROOM - MORNING
All the teens are spread around the room, eating
omelets.
PETER
So, Spinelli. When do we get to the spy stuff?
SPINELLI
Soon enough. It’s not all fun and games, you know. It’s serious stuff. You should be glad we don’t have any cases
yet.
JASON
So what should we do today?
MICHELLE
Some groceries are definitely
needed. This cereal isn’t going to last
forever.
JASON
Sounds good. Let’s have this be a shopping and hang out
day. Maybe we’ll have a little bit of a
dance party tonight?
NICOLE
I’m always up for that.
She smiles sexily.
SPINELLI
(To Jason)
Aren’t you going to approve any of
this with your co-leader?
JASON
Not if you’re going to veto the
dance party.
EXT. BEACH- DAY
Spinelli, Jason, Nicole, and Terrence are at a sandy beach
with tall pine trees surrounding them. Nicole and Terrence are swimming in the
lake. Jason is getting ready to head in, too.
Spinelli is sitting in a beach chair reading a magazine.
Despite the heat and being at the beach, she is wearing jean pants and a blue
shirt.
JASON
(To Spinelli)
Coming in?
Off Spinelli’s look:
JASON
I’ll take that as a “no”.
As Jason heads towards the water, he looks back at
Spinelli. We see her turn a page of the
magazine she’s reading. Jason calls to
her:
JASON
You need to loosen up. Have some fun
for once!
We can tell Spinelli has heard this from him before. Jason wades
into the lake.
SPINELLI
Some people need to get serious for once.
(Pause.)
And I do have fun.
JASON
Yeah, yeah.
He smiles, and glides underwater.
A computer dialing-up to the Internet is heard as we cut to:
INT.
GIRLS’ ROOM AT TSA - DAY
CLOSE
ON: Spinelli’s mouth twisted with concentration and anticipation.
We
hear the computer proclaim: “You’ve got mail!”
Shot
of the laptop screen. There is a click
of the mouse, and an e-mail is opened.
CLOSE
ON: The beginning of the e-mail message:
“TO:
spinelli85@aol.com
FROM:
tsa-hq@cia.gov
SUBJECT:
Case #1”
After a moment, Spinelli (who is sitting on her bed with the
laptop on her lap) turns around, looking just off to the side of the
camera. She shouts in a composed,
professional way:
SPINELLI
Jason! Everybody!
We have a case!
INT. MAIN ROOM AT TSA- DAY
The TSA members sit around the kitchen table. They act more professional and serious than
usual, but they still have their spunk.
Spinelli holds a printed out copy of the e-mail. She reads aloud.
SPINELLI
“On July 2nd, there was
an informal cast party at actress Fiona Carlton’s
residence—”
NICOLE
I love Fiona Carlton!
SPINELLI
“—in New York. She invited about fifty people associated
with her new movie, Close Call. After the party, Ms. Carlton
discovered most of her diamond jewelry collection was missing, including a pink
diamond pendant necklace worth approximately one million dollars. Altogether, she lost millions of dollars.”
MICHELLE
Wow.
SPINELLI
“Your job is to find out who stole
the diamonds.”
She looks up at everyone.
Then it gives us Fiona Carlton’s
phone number and address to contact her to find out who was at the party and
who might have stolen the diamonds.
JASON
Let’s do it.
INT. TSA MAIN ROOM - DAY
Spinelli has the phone to her ear. Everyone else is in the room, listening.
SPINELLI
Hello, could I speak to Fiona
Carlton please?
EXT. WOODS OUTSIDE TSA - NIGHT
Spinelli is sitting on a rock by the lake. There is only the
faint light of the moon and stars. Her knees are pulled up to her chin and her
arms are hugging her legs. She is holding her sunglasses in her right hand.
She lifts her head up, sensing something.
SPINELLI
Why aren’t you at
the dance party?
Jason’s feet appear beside Spinelli. We see him sit down beside her.
JASON
The question is
why aren’t you?
SPINELLI
(Ignoring
him)
Tell everyone not to stay up too
late. We have to be at Fiona Carlton’s
by one o’clock tomorrow.
JASON
Remember how we used to bitch about
the co-leaders?
SPINELLI
(Smiling)
Yeah… Jim and Kristin were
especially annoying.
JASON
Do you think everyone complains
about us when we’re not around?
SPINELLI
Not yet probably. We haven’t really gotten started.
Jason starts to laugh.
SPINELLI
What?
JASON
I was just remembering how you
dressed like a prep our first year.
SPINELLI
Ugh, yes. It wasn’t my fault. I
couldn’t help I went to a Catholic school with snobs.
JASON
It’s hard to imagine now.
SPINELLI
Hey, let’s not forget the mushroom
cut someone had.
JASON
They were in at the time!
SPINELLI
Yuh-uh.
They sit together silently, remembering all the fun times
they shared. After a while, Jason
starts to get up.
JASON
I should probably go back now. You coming?
SPINELLI
In a while. You go ahead.
JASON
Alright, then I guess I’ll see you
tomorrow. ‘Night, Spin.
He leaves.
Spinelli continues to stare out across the lake.
EXT. FRONT OF FIONA’S MANSION - DAY
Two cars pull up into the driveway of a very large
estate. The TSA members get out and
walk up the steps to the front door.
Spinelli and Jason are in front. Jason rings the doorbell.
A BUTLER opens the door. We see, but don’t hear, Spinelli,
Jason, and the butler conversing.
The TSA members walk inside.
INT. FIONA’S MANSION - DAY
The butler leads the TSA members into a large, extravagant
living room.
FIONA CARLTON is sitting on a red velvet sofa. She gets up to greet the TSA spies. She is thin with wavy red hair. She’s wearing a black shirt, a knee-length
denim skirt, high-heeled black shoes, and a diamond necklace. She’s in her late
twenties. She talks quickly and nervously.
She seems skittish.
FIONA
Hello. I’m glad you’re here.
JASON
No problem.
MARY
ELLEN
It’s so nice to
meet you!
FIONA
Can I get you
something to drink?
SPINELLI
No thank you, Ms.
Carlton—
FIONA
(Interrupting)
Call me Fiona.
Please, sit down.
Everyone finds a place to sit, except Spinelli and Jason,
who remain standing by Fiona’s side.
SPINELLI
I think we should
begin right away.
(To TSA
members)
Ready to write
this down, guys?
They reply with yes’s.
They’re all holding notebooks and pens except for Spinelli, Jason,
Peter, and Bruce.
FIONA
(To
Spinelli, looking at Peter and Bruce)
Aren’t they a
little young?
SPINELLI
Oh, they’re not official TSA
spies. They’re just my cousins.
PETER
Just?
SPINELLI
So, Fiona. How many people were at your party?
FIONA
Thirty. I wanted to keep it small.
The spies’ with notebooks write this down, and everything
else she says that follows.
SPINELLI
Do you have the names of everyone?
FIONA
Yes. I wrote out a list for invitations.
She gets up and shuffles through papers in a desk. She finds the list and walks back, handing
it to Spinelli.
Spinelli hands it to Jason, and he reads it.
SPINELLI
Is there anyone in particular you
think might have stolen your diamonds?
FIONA
(Shaking
her head)
I don’t know. I don’t think it would be one of the
actors. They all have plenty of
money. But I don’t know.
SPINELLI
Do you think it’s possible someone
might steal them as revenge of some sort, rather than for the money?
FIONA
I don’t think I’ve wronged anyone,
so I don’t know why they’d want revenge.
JASON
(Still
reading the list)
Who’s Kevin Hamilton? He sounds familiar.
FIONA
He’s the director of the film.
JASON
Right… He did Everlasting Nina.
FIONA
Yes, that’s him.
JASON
That was a great movie. But that was nearly ten years ago. What has he done since?
FIONA
He’s had a lot of flops
actually. He hasn’t been too successful
recently. My agent didn’t want me to
star in his movie, but the story really spoke to me. I had to play that character.
I think the movie will be good.
SPINELLI
Do you and he get
along?
FIONA
Kevin and I? Yes.
He’s a very talented director.
TERRENCE
Yet he hasn’t had
a hit in ten years…?
FIONA
(defensive)
He made some bad choices with
picking well-written scripts.
SPINELLI
Who did you invite besides the
actors and director?
FIONA
Well… the producer, John Hillbody,
the two writers, and my hair and make-up artist, Leona Smith. She was so sweet to me.
JASON
Which are the writers on this list?
FIONA
These.
She points them out, and Jason marks them with a pen.
MICHELLE
Writers don’t make much money. At least not as much as actors, directors,
and producers. One of them might have
stolen the diamonds.
SPINELLI
(To
Fiona)
Do you know either of the writers
well?
FIONA
No.
I met them for the first time at the party. I wasn’t sure I would invite them at all, but I thought it would
be nice. Since they wrote the movie we
were celebrating.
SPINELLI
We should check them out.
NICOLE
What about the diamonds? Was there anything unique about them?
FIONA
Well, I had a pink diamond pendant
on a necklace. Pink is the rarest type
of diamond. I bought it for one million
dollars in an auction. It belonged to the 1940’s French film actress Chantal
Bellamont. The other jewelry was just ordinary diamond rings, necklaces, and
earrings.
SLY
It was upstairs?
FIONA
Yes, in my bedroom in a drawer. I thought I’d locked my door, but I guess I
forgot.
SLY
Did you see anyone go upstairs
during the party?
FIONA
No.
JASON
Did anyone leave early? Or without saying goodbye?
FIONA
Umm… some may have left without me
knowing. There were a lot of people.
SPINELLI
All right, I think that’s enough for
now.
Everyone starts to get up.
If you remember anything else, give
us a call. We’ll get right on the
case. We’ll let you know if anything
comes up.
FIONA
Alright, thank you.
INT. TSA MAIN ROOM – DAY
CLOSE ON: The front door. It opens and Jason steps in.
The rest of the spies file in after him. They throw bags on
down on couches and tables, head to their bedrooms, and sit down on the
couches. Spinelli talks while walking.
SPINELLI
I’ll look up the director on the
Internet. Sly, can you find out some
stuff about the writers on your laptop?
SLY
Yeah, I’ll Google them.
SPINELLI
Good.
JASON
Does that leave me with the chore of
watching MTV?
PETER
Spinelli, what can
I do?
SPINELLI
You can help Jason with the watching
of television.
PETER
Oh, come on! Aren’t Bruce and I
going to get to do anything?
Spinelli ignores him and goes to the girls’ bedroom.
INT. GIRLS’ BEDROOM – CONTINUOUS
Spinelli walks over to her bed and put her computer on her
lap.